1 month have got by and many things has happened. dont know where should i start... after winner the cheer, relationship between him really improved. he did like talk or answer me but just for a short while. many things happened between him and me.

Just before the mid-year exam, you have a ve project to do. went to friends house to do. then while we are doing, we suddenly talk about him. they ask me why i like this kind of guy. i ask myself but i cant find the answer. i started telling them what happened. since sec2, i ask him to be my godbroth but then when we are in sec3, he sms me and tell me to remain as friend. i thought i was in the wrong so i kept apologizing and i said i will change myself(attitude). i nearly broke into tears. they ask me "did you ask him why?" i said ya, but he refuse to say. so from then on, we started being cold shoulder towards each other. i like him but i have to pretent that i hate him. it was really difficult for me to do this. then they say OoOo" you are so bai(stupid)". then they said too they have this kind of experience. the guy dont be your godbroth is because of 2 reason. First is hate. Second is love. i think it was hate. but they say from their experience is the second one. then they say it was too late already. i suddenly felt regrateful. it was just so stupid of me to misunderstand what he is trying to say... they ask me to confess to him but i think this is not a girls job. i mean it is weird for a girl to go up a guy and say you like him. people might laugh at you. so i decided not to make a fool out of myself...

Then 1 day after pe lesson, i saw he was wearing a ring on the second finger. they say that he got someone already... that was another hit on me... but i have to accept it cos i have loss my chance. soon then after, i try asking around and some rumous said that he like a sec4E girl(our batch which have already gradurated). i kept asking his friend who is it. but in my heart, i think i know who is it. but still it is his decision and i have to respect it...

Yesterday was the last paper of my mid-year exam. just before sitting the paper, i heard a news that for our chemistry, only 2 students passed in the whole level. it was like wa.. sian... the we had science mcq followed by our poa paper mcq. the poa teacher like to get his students involved in the question. to my surprised, i was my name and it is together with shawifei. i knew it sucks... but this can not affact my consentration. after the paper, he came to me and tell me "Question 8 sucks" i knew so i just said "ya" and walk away. in my mind, i wanted to tell him that is not the question that sucks. it is you that sucks and i dont know that you still have the guades to come and tell me. i would like to tell you " the question is cool without YOU. i just hate you even more now....

today is marking day so we not in school today. but i will like thinking how is my result and what am i going to do about it... it is true that there is nothing to worry now cos what ever is done can not be undone.lets wait till moday we will be getting back our paper 1 by 1... Goodluck to me...

written @ 3:02 PM